Poems
by Angel of Autumn
Summary: Poems! Chapter 1 are Dutch poems, the rest is English.
1. Gedichten

Zo, ik dacht, laat ik hier ook wat van mijn gedichten posten, lekker boeiend dat het geen verhaal is, ik wil ook graag weten wat mensen hiervan vinden... als er 'Gedicht' boven staat betekent het dat het gedicht geen naam heeft, de meeste bij mij eigenlijk.

**-Gedicht-**

Waarom doe je het nou weer?  
Waarom doe je mij dit aan?  
Je doet het keer op keer  
En laat mij in de kou staan

Ik ben hier om je te helpen  
Ook al wil je dat nu nog niet  
Ik help je het bloeden te stelpen  
Het bloed dat jij onnodig vergiet

Het geeft jou blijkbaar een kick  
Je voelt de pijn allang niet meer  
Maar ik voel die wel, en hoe moet ik  
Het je zeggen als je je rug naar mij keer?

Ik ben hier voor je en ik blijf  
Om je te helpen als het nodig is  
Je moet niet kerven in je lijf  
Voor jou voelt het goed, voor mij is het een gemis

Ik mis de oude jij  
De jongen die je ooit was  
Altijd vrolijk, altijd vrij  
Die leuke jongen uit de klas...

**-Strand-**

Met mijn voeten in het zand  
Kijk ik uit over de golven  
Ik ben hier lang geleden gestrand  
En ben half onder het zand bedolven

Ik zat met mijn verleden in de knoop  
Nu zit ik hier, in het heden  
En kijk uit over een berere toekomst, naar ik hoop  
Een toekomst zonder verleden

**-Gedicht-**

Hij zal me niet krijgen  
Ik ga nog niet ten onder  
Ik blijf gewoon zwijgen  
Ook al krijg ik dan gedonder

Ik hou m'n lippen stijf op elkaar  
En weiger iets te zeggen  
Hij slaat en schopt - hij doet maar  
Ik heb hem niets uit te leggen

**-Gedicht-**

Daar sta je dan  
Verlaten, alleen  
Niks dat je meer kan  
Nergens kan je nog heen

Niemand meer om mee te praten  
Niks om op te steunen  
Alleen, verlaten  
Niets dan een muur om tegen te leunen

**-Gedicht- **_(en dit keer is het de titel...)_

Een gedicht  
Woorden   
Rijmend   
Akkoorden 

Passend   
Gevoel   
Aansprekend   
Met een doel

Voor jezelf  
Om te delen  
Een gevoel  
Zoals zovelen

**-Liefde-**

Ik dacht dat ik liefde had  
Gevangen in een fles  
Maar liefde was toch niet dat  
En geleerd heb ik mijn les

De liefde kun je niet vangen  
Liefde is een gevoel  
Lopend door roze gangen  
Zittend op een fluwelen stoel

Met je hoofd in de wolken  
In de zevende hemel zijn  
Het gevoel is niet te vertolken  
Maar ook de liefde doet soms pijn

Daarom zou je bijna niet aan liefde beginnen  
Omdat je bang bent voor de pijn  
Maar open je hart en laat de liefde binnen  
Want de liefde is vooral erg fijn

**_Please, let me know what you thought about it!_**

**_Laat ff weten wat je ervan vond, voor degenen hier die geen engels kunnen..._**


	2. Poems 2

**_Chapter 2! Please review and let me know what you thought of it? )_**

**Understanding**

No words  
One glance  
And I know what you see

Not necessary   
To talk  
You're looking at me

We understand

Each other  
Without a word

Just one look  
In your eyes  
No one ever heard

**Not equal  
**

I can't return your words  
I can't return your gift  
I feel so much less then you  
I can only say 'what if'

What if i could return  
What if i could give  
What if i felt equal  
What if i could live

I'd write a letter to you  
To tell you how i feel  
How I know I'm not good enough  
And why I don't feel real

But I can't find the words  
I can't write to you  
I still feel not equal  
Even though through

Everything we've experienced  
Together, as good friends  
I still feel less worth then you  
And so the sad story ends

-special thanks to my friend Vinícius for giving me inspiration-

**Sorry**

Why is sorry so hard to say  
why isn't there another way  
to make apologies to you  
but i just don't seem to get through

not through the embarrassment  
not through the loose sand  
sorry is so hard to say  
but for me there's no other way

I'm sorry

**Together**

Together we're going to heaven  
Together we're going to die  
Together, we're on the same level  
Together we're learning to fly 

Together, loving you, loving me  
Together, ready to go  
Together, the way it's supposed to be  
Together, starting to know

Together, ready for this  
Together in suicide  
Together, and this is  
The last deed of a man and his bride

**Empty Inside  
**

Empty inside

Since the day you left

Everything behind

Including me

Why did you

Have to go?

Why is your soul

Not one to rest?

Why couldn't you

Stay here with me?

You loved me,

Right?

Was it that easy

To leave me?

To leave our house?

To leave our place?

To leave...

What did you

Actually leave?

Did you take

Your heart

With you

To a new place?

To give it to

A new woman?

Was it that easy

To leave me with

This big empty space

Inside?

I guess you don't feel it

I hope your new woman

Will leave you the same way

That you left me

And that you will feel

An empty space

Inside

Where your heart is

Supposed to be.

**_© Marjet, 2006_**


	3. Poems 3

_**And a few more! Reviews? (A)**_

**-Lost-  
**

I don't know  
I lost my way  
Don't know how to get home

Just sitting here  
Staring in the distance  
And I'm all alone

No one's here  
And I'm lost  
In this big hole called a world

My path is gone  
I don't see a way  
To get home again, to return

**-White Light Guide-**

You have  
A little light  
In my darkness

You bring  
A stripe white  
In my black

You give me  
A smile  
When I'm crying

You are  
My white light guide  
To bring me back

**-Forward-**

I won't look back  
I'll hold on  
And go  
Forward

I won't sit and cry  
I'll walk  
And look  
Forward

I'll be strong  
Get over it  
And live on  
Forward

I'll forget  
Things in past  
I'll love again  
Forward

**-Damn You-**

Damn those eyes  
Who followed me  
Everywhere I went

Damn your smile  
Where I melted for  
It adorned your face

Damn your words  
I believed every single one  
And you made me believe

Damn those gifts  
You conquered my heart with  
They made me adore you

Damn you  
I loved you  
And you threw my love away

**-Feelings-**

I'll wait for you  
For you to discover  
Your feelings

I'll stay with you  
Until you know  
What's important

Do you love me  
Or am I just a friend  
You'll figure it out

And one day  
We'll both know  
And we'll be happy

**-Perhaps Love-**

I think I love you  
But how should I know?  
I don't really know you  
I don't know if you'll go

Or if you will stay  
Right here with me  
Then perhaps we may  
Be together, each other's key

© M.C. 2006


	4. Poems 4

**_And again an update! And again I would like some reviews (A)._**

I Killed

You saw my pain  
You saw my soul  
But you were out to gain  
It had no meaning to you at all

You saw through my eye  
Things I didn't want you to see  
But all you said was: 'Goodbye,  
I'm leaving, you mean nothing to me.'

You saw too much  
But you didn't care  
About the kiss, about the touch  
About the feelings that weren't there

Now I stand here, alone  
And I don't feel any guilt  
No calls anymore on the phone  
Nothing about the relationship we had build

There's nothing now to talk about  
I killed, so you left me once again  
You saw too much and I'm too proud  
To let anyone take over my heart and my pain

**Rain**

The rain is falling  
Creating a pool  
The water is calling  
But you can't hear it... you fool

It's calling for me to go outside  
Back to where I belong  
Now there's no need for me to hide  
I've been away for too long

I'm walking in the rain  
I can almost see the mere  
All I feel now is the pain  
And people who'll ask 'Where?'

'Where is she? Where has she gone to?'  
But then I already passed the gate  
Living is something I never did and never would do  
Now it's already too late

I drowned myself, I drowned  
In the water, in the rain  
This is what it was all about  
Now I leave it for you, the pain

**Everything**

Everything I wanted  
Was just some understanding  
Everything I felt  
Were my feelings stranding

Everything I needed  
Was a loving heart  
Everything I thought  
Was to create a new start

Everything I knew  
Was that my life had no meaning  
Everything I made  
Was a plan, a well thought-out thing

And everything people said  
Was that the girl laid down her head  
And everything people thought  
'What a waste of the knife she had bought.'

**Jump**

I walk up the stairs  
Step by step  
My feelings not there  
Secretly kept

People walk by  
Glancing, 'Hello'  
But those feelings of mine...  
They don't know

I don't know them too  
May it be hate?  
Do I hate you?  
Is it too late?

No, it isn't  
I still have time  
To do this, and  
To complete this rhyme

Now I reached my goal  
I walk on the deck  
I jump in the black hole  
And I'll never come back

**Loved**

You know I love you  
You know I do  
But you also know  
That I hate you too

You know what you have done  
You threw my love away  
Suddenly you were gone  
Leaving me with the pain

You know I loved you  
You know I did  
But you also know  
That I'll kill you to make it fit

**New Life**

I see it in your eyes  
You don't love me anymore  
You lied behind my back  
And I don't know what that's for

I still loved you  
I really did  
But your love wasn't true  
Your love didn't fit

So I walked away  
To start a new life  
To find someone worth my love  
To put away the knife

I left you behind  
And I didn't let a tear  
I'm not pushing 'rewind'  
This is how it's supposed to be

**See The Beauty Of Life**

You can't keep taking  
And give nothing back  
You can't keep erasing  
Things you did, so black

You have to become white  
And know what it is  
To have your beloved ones by your side  
The feeling, the touch, the kiss

But you have no heart  
Or it is made of stone  
But it's not yet torn apart  
It can still be made whole

Then you have to begin giving  
And see the beauty of life  
Only then you can start living  
And put away your knife

_**© M.C. 2006**_


	5. Poems 5

_**And here's a little update again! Hope you like it. Reviews? #puppy-eyes#**_

**Don't Explain The World**

Why is it that you think  
You have the best theory?  
Why is it that you are  
So convinced you're right?

Why is it that you don't  
See what everyone sees?  
Why is it that you think  
You're special...

Because whatever you think  
Realize you're only watching  
This world  
From behind two eyes  
That are only fifteen years old

And whatever you do  
Think about the fifteen more years  
That will come

Don't try to explain the world  
The world doesn't owe you  
An explanation

The only explanation that should be given  
Is yours  
To the rest of the world.

**Fate's Grief**

How could I have been so sure  
About something that never existed?  
How could I have taken it for real  
When it was just an illusion?  
The love was never there

I see that now  
But it's too late  
Fate has chosen my heart  
To live in lies forever  
Because I can't let go of you.

I know it was fake  
I know it was nothing but snow  
Melting as it touched the ground.

Well, I have reached the bottom  
And I am melting  
As my heart is crying  
To please let go of you.  
To please prick this balloon...

There is no hope left now  
I've made up my mind  
I will accept my heart's choice  
To think you once loved me  
And to grieve for it.

**Colours**

There seems to be no end  
To the black I'm living in  
But why are my clothes black?  
Why am I living black, thinking black?  
Shouldn't that be something  
Happening at the end of the line?  
I know it should

There will be enough black  
In the space beneath the earth  
That is reserved for me

So during life,  
Let's try to summon colours  
Let bits of black remain  
I mustn't lose reality  
But let the colours  
Rule my soul.

**Waste Of My Love**

How could I have been so stupid?  
So stupid to think  
That maybe this was meant  
That maybe I would be worth  
Your precious attention  
And your precious time

But I realize now  
You've seen it as a waste of time  
And though it's hard to accept  
I will have to admit  
It indeed was a waste.

A waste of my love.

**Sacrifice**

Did the sacrifice  
Have to be that big?  
The sacrifice for our love  
Why?

Cried so much  
For you, for us  
Never able to ignore  
The sacrifice  
We both had to bring

Give up our families,  
Our homes,  
Our countries,  
Our friends,  
Our everything  
Or give up the love

Distance so big  
There had to be  
A sacrifice  
And we both decided  
What would be best  
For us

We can never know  
If we decided wrongly  
But since we only talk  
Through letters  
There is no need anymore to know.

© Marjet 2006/2007


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